Been a hot minute since my last post. I've been busy with college and two jobs, so I haven't been doing as much computer stuff. I wanted to share something that I have been thinking about / realizing recently, which was clarified by some counsel I received from my Bishop (Bishop Gerasim, a wonderful and holy man I had the pleasure of meeting) that helped shed light on previous discussions with my own spiritual father.

I am in no position to teach - I am simply doing my best to paraphrase the Bishop's words and reflect on them. Read these with many grains of salt. My hope is that this will direct you to contemplation, further reading and prayer.

  1. We shouldn't have this idea that there are two worlds which we must switch between - the good and light world of the Church, and the evil and dark world outside of the Church. We operate as Christians in both. In a way, I realized that that idea of black and white is sort of a gnostic thing.

  2. You should not see your parents or your home as enemy territory, even if they disagree with or even persecute your beliefs. Your duty as a Christian is to be the best son possible - the type of son your parents can be proud of (not in the sense of pride, but in the sense of gratitude). By following the commandments and being the most hardworking, helpful and loving son - in essence, following the commandments to the best of your ability - you give them no justification for opposing you and guide them closer to the truth by way of your virtue. Don't grumble about those who disagree with you or ruminate on how wrong they are. (I remember his grace saying to do this "even if they were five-point Calvanists", which made us all chuckle). Love them.

  3. Confidence is not the same thing as pride. You must learn confidence. Confidence is to be able to say, "I am going to try my best to do this; I have prayed for God's assistance in this, and I trust in His guidance." Do not be afraid to fail. You have, in fact, never done this before. The man before his wedding is nervous because he has, in fact, never had this exact wedding before. You are approaching the golden years of your life - it is the best time to try and fail, the best time to grow and learn. You do not even own your own washing machine - you use your parents'.

  4. Take your life day by day. God has a plan for you. You have no idea what He has planned for you in the long term. Do not kid yourself and think that you know what is going to happen. You may desire to be a monk now, and may find yourself married later. We live in strange times - who knows where God will lead you? Take your life one day at a time, and do your best to learn and pray.

The Bishop said something along these lines. The last one is the way my spiritual father put it when I asked him a similar question to what prompted #3 from the Bishop. My own reflections are mixed in.

My auxilary takeway from many of these meditations is this:

Don't be a doomer! The world has a ton of problems, but just because of that you shouldn't be anxious. You are a Christian. You are called to follow the commandments everywhere and to be the light of God everywhere. Do not despair or get tangled in the world's problems. Focus on the light of Christ and you will be guided through it all. Look at the world through the lens of God and His will. Do not be anxious over that which is beyond your control. Do not lose your head over how everything is bad and you need to find the perfect solution, or whatever.

'"Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? "So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? "Therefore do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.'

Matthew 6:25-34 (NKJV)

Perhaps this is elementary. In fact, I'm pretty sure it is. I am rather spiritually childish most of the time. I am working on this with God's grace. Whoever you are reading this, may God bless you and have mercy on you. And, may he guide you to greater truth.

Christ is in our midst!

Luke